Knots.

I swear that I'm different
What else can I do, right?
And yet I find myself
Out of everyone else's sight
Fading into oblivion
Disappearing into the air
And in the end, I was a breath
That everyone knew was there
But no one ever saw me.
A poem about myself
Original, right?
Because everyone writes about himself
Every time
But I see people
Clear as day
I observe and understand
They never need to explain
I appreciate them
And take few for granted
I take the time
I always get it
So I can see people
And try to help
I can see everyone
But myself
I comprehend everything
Except what's in this skin
Tell me, how is that
Any way to win?
I keep finding myself
In the corner of my room
Trying to whisper
What I think is true
Fighting for myself
Trying to keep who I am
Before it blows away
Like the grains of sand
Hugging my knees
And holding too tight
Telling myself
What's wrong and what's right
Meanwhile faces
Of all of my friends
Float in front of my closed eyes
Again and again
I'm fighting for them
And losing myself
I look in the mirror
And can't even tell
This is who I am
That is me
But that's the person
They can't see
I'm drifting back and forth
I'm falling and flying up
Between the worry that everyone needs me
And the fear that nobody does
I can't save the day
When I'm slipping away
Screaming "no one understands" in my sleep
Why is my confidence the one thing I can't keep?
I swear that I'm gonna be fine
Things like these just take a little time
I have to convince myself I don't care what anyone thinks
This is a poem about me, maybe I will see
And no one is going to understand
That's okay, that's the plan
Why are knotted rhymes my therapy?
Why are my emotions choking me?
It's my curse to love everyone
More than they love me
And I need to stop writing now
I need to stop crying out
Convince myself I won't fade to nothing
This doesn't make sense, but I had to say something